The Greatest Truth...Our Son

It's the day we had been waiting for...November 9th.  You might be wondering what's so special about November 9th.  That's the day we got the call.  You know, "the call".  The one where your adoption agency says they have a child for you.  That was our November 9th.  We got the call saying that there's a little boy named Maxim in Russia who is ready to be adopted.

It's been a crazy couple of weeks to say the least.  We've been talking with our agency every day, applying for visas, planning our trip, getting our paperwork in order and generally freaking out.  I haven't slept much since that day and I think I'm pretty incoherent most days but I'm more than excited and so is Lenski.  In fact he was so overwhelmed that he had to sit down and put his head between his legs because he was going to either pass out or throw up.  Luckily neither of those happened.

So it's official...we're getting a boy!  His name is Maxim and we plan to keep it that way.  We will be giving him the middle name Veritas which is Latin for Truth.  When you put that together with his first name which means The Greatest you have one powerful reminder of God's love.  Maxim Veritas Llorens...The Greatest Truth.

Please continue to pray for us as we frantically try to get everything in order.  We are still far away from our financial goals so please be praying that God will provide what we need.  Please pray for Maxim as he does not know us yet and this will be a huge trauma in his life to leave what he knows to move to Michigan.  It won't be for another 6 months or so but it still needs covered in prayer.  Please be praying for us as it will be heart breaking to meet him and then leave him.  Please pray that we can get our paperwork together quickly.  And last...please pray for safety when we travel there and back.

Thank you for following our journey!  It's not over yet!  So stay tuned for more exciting news!

Your Christmas Shopping Can Help Bring Our Baby Home

Christmas is a huge retail holiday and I often get frustrated with that.  I'm always looking for ways to make gifts more local, handmade, service oriented or charity oriented.  But not everyone looks at it the same way I do and I understand.  I don't expect anyone to do that.  But what if I told you that your normal Christmas shopping could be charity oriented without changing the actual gifts?  Would that surprise you?  Well, it's true.  Here are some ways you can support our adoption while buying your regular gifts:

1. Shop through our Amazon link.  It's very simple.  Just click on the Amazon link on the right side of the page.  Once you get to Amazon just do your regular shopping.  There's no sign ups or codes to enter.  By clicking through OUR link we automatically get credit for anything you might buy.
2. Buy some coffee through our link.  If you have a coffee drinker in your family or even someone who appreciates gourmet fair trade coffee then this is the site for you.  Just click on our link on the right side of this page.
3. Buy one of our bracelets at Tree Huggers.  This is a great little store where you will find tons of eco-friendly gift ideas and you can add one of our bracelets to your order to support us.  
4. Buy a t-shirt from The Mitten State through our link.  People often buy clothes for people for Christmas so why not make it local and support our adoption in the process.  They have great apparel and the company is right in Comstock Park.  
5. Buy one of our t-shirts!  Ok, so this one may not be at the top of everyone's list but I hated to leave the list at 4 instead of 5.  Plus we still have some L and XL shirts left to sell as well as one M.  So you can feel free to buy one of those directly from us if you'd like.  

So there you have it.  It's simple and supportive and we appreciate you even thinking about it.  

Just One E-mail...Pretty Please?

Dear friends and family,

First I want to thank you all for your incredible support through our adoption journey.  It's been great to know that there's so many people behind us and holding us up when the weight of all this can feel like we might be crushed.  

Second...I wanted to let you all know that our fundraising is going well but we still have a long road ahead. Over $20,000 to be exact.  That's mainly because we have to take three trips to Russia.  Lenski and I continue to fundraise like crazy and we're also applying for grants.  But one thing that would be a HUGE help to us is the Adoption Tax Credit.  

So this is the third thing.  This credit basically refunds you between $10 - 13,000 in adoption expenses.  So you can see how important this is when you're looking at a $60,000 adoption cost.  The bad part is that this credit may no longer exist in 2013.  Unless your adoption is complete in 2012 you won't be able to get a refund...unless we can gain support.  I'm writing this to ask you to consider sending an email to our senators and representative asking them to be cosponsors of the Making Adoptions Affordable Act which would make the Adoption Tax Credit a permanent credit.  

Don't freak out about writing a letter on your own.  I've got one already written for you.  There's a few spots you have to fill in your own words but it's brief.  I'm going to add it at the end of this letter and you can copy and paste it into any message.  Just don't forget to fill in your parts.  That means you need to read the letter :)  Here are the ways to get in touch with the right people. 

Debbie Stabenow - http://www.stabenow.senate.gov/?p=contact

-For this one you'll want to copy and paste YOUR finished letter into the message box.  It works.  I've tried it.

Carl Levin - https://www.levin.senate.gov/contact/email/

-This works the same as Debbie Stabenow

To find your representative just go to this address - http://www.house.mi.gov/mhrpublic/

-Type in your information and you'll be directed to their page where you can find their contact info.  

-You can then send the message accordingly.

I know this may seem political but it's not.  Adoption is an amazing thing and many families just can't do it because of finances.  This credit could change all that and help bring many orphans to loving families.  Please consider not only helping our family by doing this but all the other possible waiting families.  We can use all the help we can get.  Ok, here's the letter...

Dear Senator/Representative NAME:

I am writing to ask you to support the federal adoption tax credit by cosponsoring the bipartisan S. 3616/H.R. 4373 – Making Adoptions Affordable Act. This credit is set to expire on December 31, 2012. Since 1997, the adoption tax credit has helped tens of thousands of parents offset the high cost of adoption, making it possible for them to provide children with loving, permanent families. S.3616/H.R. 4373 is the only bill in Congress that includes the refundable provision, allowing many more children and families to benefit from the credit equally; without the refundable provision some families simply cannot access the credit.

The adoption tax credit is especially important to me and my family because… (This is important, put a face to the issue. Tell Congress why this matters to you. Your Members of Congress value your voice!)

If Congress does not take action, the current adoption tax credit will expire at the end of 2012. The credit will be reduced to $6,000, and will only benefit the few families that adopt children with special needs and have qualified adoption expenses. Most families adopting children from foster care, inter-country adoption, and domestic infant adoption will not receive any benefit. Without the adoption tax credit, many parents hoping to adopt will be unable to do so, and others will face great financial hardship. The adoption tax credit is essential to ensuring that as many children as possible find the forever families they deserve and ensuring that those families are in a more stable financial position to provide an environment where children can thrive.

The adoption tax credit must be extended to help as many children as possible find the permanent, loving family they need and deserve. For 2012 it should be made refundable again so that most adoptive families will benefit from it. The best adoption tax credit would be permanent, refundable, inclusive of all types of adoption, and remain a “flat” credit for children with special needs.

On behalf of the countless children waiting to be adopted, and the many thousands of families that stand to benefit from the adoption tax credit, thank you for your attention to this important issue.

Pancakes and Butterflies

It's already October and I don't know where the time has gone.  Our dossier has been turned in and now we wait.  During the waiting period we study up on adoption and parenting.  We fill out tons of grant applications.  And of course, we fundraise.

It has been amazing to see how God has provided for this adoption.  It leaves me speechless...and that's very uncommon.  But we still have more to go.  We are looking at another $20,000 left to raise.  Yes, I meant to put that many zero's in there.  Because we have to travel to Russia THREE, count them, THREE times we still have this large chunk left.  In case you didn't know...it's not cheap to fly two people to Russia three different times.  So I spend a lot of my time handing this over to God, begging his forgiveness when I take it back and grinning when he surprises me with yet another donation of some sort.  But back to the fundraising...

October means it's Pancake Breakfast time and I am frantically trying to get everything ready.  There's supplies to get, volunteers to organize and silent auction items to acquire.  It's a lot of stuff to do.  But so many of you have made it easy by donating items for the auction or providing our much needed supplies.  It has made a huge difference for me.  But I still have butterflies in my stomach.  You always wonder when you put on an event like this, "Will anyone show up?"  And that's when the butterflies start fluttering in my tummy.  (Notice my child-like language.  My parenting research is paying off)

So the question is, "Will YOU show up?"  If you do, here's what you can expect:

1. Pancakes will be served from 9 am until 11 am.  You can come whenever you want.  You can come and NOT eat pancakes too!  The silent auction will be going on at the same time and you are not required to pay admission for that.
2. Adults will be charged $5 and children $3.  Once you're in, it's unlimited pancakes for everyone.
3. We kept it simple by just having pancakes, coffee and juice.  Sorry, we're just not fancy...or rich.
4. This is not a programmed event.  Lenski will be the MC and talk at different points but we'd really like it if you all just enjoy your Saturday morning with each other over some delicious pancakes.  
5. The silent auction will end at 11 am.  The highest bidder can take home their item if they are still there.  Otherwise we will deliver it to you.
6. We will have our t-shirts for sale there.  If you haven't had a chance to get one you may want to bring some extra cash.  They're really cool and you're going to want one.  They're $20 each or 2 for $30.

If you're wondering if there's anything you'd like to bid on at our silent auction, here's our complete list of items that will be available.

• Biggby package (sorry, no gift cards)
• Tattoo gift certificate (Lenski would like to add that this would make a great gift for him)
• 2 dual or couples massage gift certificates valued at $80 each
• A one-hour interior design consultation with Deidre Interiors valued at $75
• 6 one hour massage gift certificates for The Soma Center (Renee Green) valued at $50 each
• A $50 gift certificate to One Girl's Treasure
• 3 gift certificates for a customizable quarter sheet cake
• A dozen of Art Green cookies in these flavors: Heath, Molasses, Chocolate Chip, Oatmeal Raisin and Sugar with sprinkles.  Valued at $15 / dozen.
• Brand new home fencing that's 2 feet tall and 100 feet long
• Homemade fudge
• 2 retro silver lamps
• Snoopy baby package
• Brand new IKEA hammock valued at $30
• Brand new IKEA pendant lamp valued at $20
• $10 gift card to Koetsier's
• Wine and cheese package with brand new wine glasses and salad plates as well as cloth napkins
• A salon items package with Bed Head, Pureology and more valued at $120
• Brand new wall clock valued at $13
• A Magic Bullet set
• Brand new wireless mouse
• Brand new Calvin Klein hat, scarf and gloves set bought last year from Younkers
• Ladies brand new watch and jewelry set valued at $35
• Mens brand new watch, wallet and pen set valued at $35
• Brand new solar charger
• Brand new chocolate colored Moby wrap valued at $45
• Brand new pedometer and pink yoga map
• Brand new bathroom faucet valued at $39
• Cooking set with 3 Rachael Ray cookbooks and a new set of stainless steel bowls valued at $70
• No Greater Love 90-day devotional valued at $15
• The Wounded Spirit by Frank Peretti valued at $19
• Brand new Infantino 3-n-1 Shop and Play mat valued at $25
• Summer Infant Cosleeper valued at $45
• Samsonite laptop workbag on wheels
• An authentic Amis made quilt valued at $500

So there you have it.  If you made it this far down I'm impressed.  We hope you will mark your calendars and join us at the pancake breakfast on October 13th from 9 to 11 am at Tallmadge Community Church.

Pancake Breakfast & Silent Auction

Tallmadge Community Church

0-1428 Leonard NW

Grand Rapids, MI 49534

Meeting the Russians

Tonight we had a very unique opportunity.  Our adoption agency has an office located in St. Petersburg, Russia.  Two of the key leaders over there were here to visit the main office in Jenison this week.  They were here for several reasons but one of them was for an international families open house.  It was the chance to come and meet key people from different international offices.  They had two men from Russia, a lady from China and a man from Ethiopia.

We were able to get a lot of time to talk with them as there was only one other couple there who is going through the Russia program.  We had a great time talking to them about the adoption process, Russian culture and even where Lenski's name comes from!  They were so intrigued by his name that they asked him if he knew where it came from.  Then they shared more history about it.  It was fantastic.  Lenski, of course, talked to them about soccer as they informed us that it is the most popular sport there right now.

It was nice to get to meet them since we found out that normally we wouldn't.  They are the key people in helping us find a child but usually we'd never get to see them in person.  So we were blessed to get that chance tonight.  To mark the occasion we asked if we could take a picture.  As you look at the photo please say a prayer for these two men.  The responsibilities they have are huge and personally we'd love to have them covered in prayer as they help us become a family.

How Much Do We Make From Amazon?

Lenski brought up a very good point that people will probably want to know how much we make from your purchases on Amazon.  So I've decided to copy and paste what I found in my affiliate account.

These categories have a fixed percentage rate:



Other categories are considered volume based percentage rates:



We're still trying to get the hang of all this but it seems to be such a win/win for everybody.  If you have more questions please feel free to ask and we'll do our best to answer.

Amazon for Adoption Expenses!

Fundraising is not an easy thing.  Stop and think for a moment how easy it is for you to ask someone for help.  Now add on to it that the help you need is financial.  It's a sticky subject with many people and we understand.  In our journey to raise all of our adoption funds we are trying to make things easy and natural.  For instance our pancake breakfast is coming up next month.  Lots of families go out to eat   for breakfast on a Saturday so why not use that money to support your loved ones by attending this special fundraiser?
Another way you can help us is by doing your normal Amazon shopping through our special link.  Whenever you do we will get a small percentage of the profits.  There's no need to do extra shopping.  Just use it as you normally would.  The only difference is that you use our link instead of typing in amazon.com.  To make it easier you could just save that page in your browser bar.  Then it's easily accessible anytime you plan on shopping.
We understand that money doesn't grow on trees and most people we know are not in wealthy positions in life.  That's why we're trying to line up our fundraisers with things you may already spend money on.  To make it easy for you to give and support us without any worries.  We hope you'll consider using this link in the future.  Just click on it below to get started.


Tanya & Lenski's Amazon Link

My future child is not a sweater

If the title of this post has already made you confused let me explain...

I am often asked about why we chose to adopt from Russia.  People are shocked when they hear how much it costs and they can't believe we wouldn't go the more "affordable" route by adopting through foster care or domestically.  I understand that the "cost" of adoption is a big deal.  After all, we are the ones trying to raise almost $45,000.  So the cost is a big deal to us too.

The difference is that we didn't go into adoption looking for an "affordable" child.  It's not always like shopping for a sweater and trying to find the best deal.  Hence the name of this post.  I'm all for finding a deal.  For those of you who know me, you know this is true to the fullest extent.  But sometimes there are things in life that this doesn't apply to.  Adoption CAN be one those.

The truth is that children need families.  That's the bottom line.  So if your financial situation in life limits where and how you can adopt then I understand.  But sometimes God calls you to something that's beyond your means and capabilities.  Not because he wants you to suffer under the pressure and stress but because He wants you to trust him to do something miraculous.

We see this in the Bible when God tells a guy named Joshua to walk around a fortified city wall and blow on some instruments to make the walls fall down.  Not a great military strategy if you ask me but God knew what He was doing.  Just read Joshua 6 and tell me that doesn't sound crazy.

If that doesn't strike you as weird how about the time He told Gideon that He would hand over the Mideonites but only if he would get rid of most of his army and go in with 300 men.  To make it even more "God style" Gideon and his men just needed to stand around the camp, break some pitchers and blow their horns and the whole camp would go into panic and undo themselves.  Gideon and his men just got to watch.  It's in Judges 7, trust me.

In both of these stories God called these men to something bigger then they could have imagined and they had to make a decision.  They had to decide to obey God or follow logic.  They chose to be obedient and God was more than faithful to come through for them.

Lenski and I started this process by WANTING to adopt domestically.  Not because of affordability but because we heard that there is a need for families willing to adopt children of other races.  So we set out on that path.  We had all the money we would need for that.  But God came in and turned things upside down like He often does.  He called us to something that seems beyond our reach.  But we had to decide if we would trust Him and be obedient or make the "good financial" decision and stay in the USA.  Despite the fear that came from looking at the numbers we decided to go with Russia.  And I'm so glad we did.  We've been able to see God work in miraculous ways.  Now it's time you see it too.  Here's what he's done in just 4 months:

$4,160 has been sent to us as donations
$361 in change has been collected and donated
$1,098 was made by selling things people gave to us
$500 was given to us by a church unexpectedly (They struggle to pay their bills)
$398 has been raised and donated by our 8 year old cousin
$200 was given to Lenski as part of an award he won (Lenski's never won an award like this)
$760 has been miraculously refunded to us from our mortgage, gas and insurance companies
$2,360 was raised at a 3 day garage sale selling items you donated to us
$550 is how much Lenski will make from speaking engagements that he was unexpectedly asked to do

That alone is $10,387 and that's not even the total amount we've raised.  It also doesn't include the fundraisers that are coming up or grants we intend to apply for.

I am so thankful that we heard God's calling and responded with obedience instead of listening to our fears.  What an amazing thing it is to see God working in such crazy ways.

Becoming a multi-cultural family

Lenski and I often forget that we are an inter-racial couple.  It just never really occurs to us.  Ok, maybe it does when Lenski's skin is so nice and tan and I look more like a ghost but normally it doesn't cross our minds.  As we prepare for our future child one of the things we've had to think about is how we will parent cross culturally.  We've read a lot about this subject and here's some key things we wanted to share with you.

• Knowing something about child care practices, sleeping arrangements, toileting and hygeine, discipline, and even how children were carried takes on special importance when everything a child is experiencing is new and unfamiliar.
• Families can incorporate artifacts into their home and their new child's own space that reflect his/her culture.  
• Experimenting ahead of time with foods which will be familiar to the child is another way to feel connected.
• One mother stressed the importance of learning some minimal survival phrases and words such as: I'll be back; I am your mamma/papa; no; yes; I love you; food/eat; stop; come here; show me where it hurts; toilet.
• A person's ethnic identity is a person's sense of belonging to an ethnic group.  Ethnic identity is drawn from the realization that part of one's thinking, perceptions, feelings, and behaviors are consistent with those of the members of that ethnic group.  An adopted child has lost important ways of connecting with his/her ancestors and with contemporaries with whom he shares ethnicity.  
• If internationally adopted children are going to grow up with a cultural awareness of their ethnic groups, they will need to be part of communities in which those cultural values are transmitted.  
• The goal is to raise a child who can identify and interact with people of his own ethnic group and not be embarrassed to have been raised by white parents.
• The goal is for the child to appreciate his ethnic and cultural heritage enough not to feel alienated from others with the same heritage and to want to explore it and draw on it.  
• Culture camp can be an excellent experience for internationally adopted children.  It brings together children who have had a common experience not shared by most people.

These tidbits are from some of the books we've read.  It's really important to us to communicate with our child that we value their culture and that we hope they will too.  We are not wanting to "Americanize" a child although we understand that will be difficult NOT to do since we live in America.  

Sometimes people don't understand why Americans want to adopt children from other countries.  They think that we feel we need to "rescue" their children.  This can create animosity about international adoption.  Please pray for us as we continue this process.  We do not want to send the wrong message to people and we could use your prayers in that matter.  We would also love prayer for wisdom.  Wisdom to know how to parent cross culturally.  It's a big and very important task.  

We are excited about parenting cross culturally.  We only hope and pray that we do it well.  

Mean what you say and say what you mean

These days it's not uncommon to hear someone call another person retarded or even to refer to an event or thing as such.  We use it interchangeably with the word stupid or dumb.  But what does that mean for those who are developmentally challenged or delayed?  Does that mean that they're stupid or dumb?  Of course that's never what we mean but the fact remains that our words are powerful and they can communicate more than what we'd like.  What does this have to do with our adoption?

Adoptive parents and children are subjected to something similar.  As Lenski and I continue to learn more about adoption we want to share it with you, our "village", as a way to help us all grow and be better prepared for this change in our lives.  The truth is that many of you will be part of this child's life and the words you use will impact them.  So let's choose them wisely and really think about what we're saying.  We've been given a great list of positive and negative ways to use adoption terms and we'd like you to take a look:

Positive Language                                                            Negative Language
Birth Parent                                                                        Real Parent
Biological Parent                                                                Natural Parent
Birth Child                                                                          Own Child
Born to unmarried parents                                                  Illegitimate
Terminate parental rights                                                    Give up
Make an adoption plan                                                       Give away
To parent                                                                            To keep
Waiting child                                                                      Adoptable child; Available child
Parent                                                                                 Adoptive parent
Intercountry adoption                                                         Foreign adoption
Child placed for adoption                                                   Unwanted child
Court termination                                                                Child taken away
Child with special needs                                                     Handicapped child
Child from abroad                                                               Foreign child
WAS adopted                                                                      Is adopted

We understand if some of these are easier than others.  Lenski and I are also working on this shift.  But we all need to remember that words not only describe, they evoke feelings and that can be positive or negative.  Since we want to celebrate adoption and recognize it as the positive option it is we want our language to reflect that.  We hope that you will join us.

What can a garage sale do?

This past weekend Lenski and I had our Adoption fundraiser / garage sale.  I've done plenty of garage sales in my life.  I used to have huge ones when I was the youth pastor at Frontline Community Church.  I've helped friends and family have them.  And I've had some just for myself.  But none quite compare to this one.  If you're wondering how a span of 3 days of selling other peoples unwanted items can be this significant let me share with you just what a garage sale can do...

1. It can obviously raise A LOT of money - We raised over $2,300 in just 3 days!  That's a huge chunk of our next big payment to the adoption agency.
2. It can bring the adoption community together in a unique way - We met so many people who have been touched by adoption.  There were some who shared their story of BEING adopted while others have already adopted and were starting the process for another.  Still there were some who were just getting started and were intrigued by this fundraiser idea.  We connected, we cried, we related and most importantly...we understood each other.  
3. It can bring families together - No, I'm not talking about the actual adoption.  We had family that drove a long way really early in the morning just to help us get set up.  Then they chose to stay and suffer through the blistering heat ALL DAY to help us run it.  We had other family that came from another state just to help us!  Not only did they come to help with the sale but they brought items for the sale, treated us to dinner, cooked us dinner and celebrated this journey with us.  These were meaningful days with such precious family members.  Watching teenagers give up their time to come and help is moving, really moving.
4. It can be a friends reunion - Friends we hadn't seen in awhile or don't normally get to see all dropped by to encourage and support us.  It was so good to see so many friendly faces.
5. It can bless others - Even though this sale was for our adoption we decided to give all of the remaining items to our friends so they too can have an adoption fundraiser sale at the end of the summer.  So you may not think that box of "junk" you dropped off can really do much but it is actually helping to bring 3 children to their forever families.

A garage sale can and did do a lot.  It was hard work and we were not alone.  There were so many people who came to our rescue and helped us with the sale.  We couldn't have made it without ALL of you.  And it couldn't have been such a success without lots of you dropping by to pick up a few things and leave a very BIG donation.  To all of you we humbly say thank you.

Get to know our child

As many of you are following our adoption story we thought we'd prepare you as we are being prepared by helping you get to know our future child.  Here are some things you should know.

• Our child has just been born or has been within the last 6 months.
• Our child's birthparents made a very hard and brave decision to terminate their parental rights.  They need our prayers for healing.
• Our child will be placed in a Baby Home or Dom Rebienka.  This is for children under 4 years old.
• Anyone in the region of the Baby Home will have the opportunity to adopt him/her until they are 6 months old.
• When they are older than 6 months they are placed on a list for anyone in all of Russia to adopt.
• Around the time they turn 11-12 months they will be able to be adopted by us.
• The Baby Home they live in will not have a lot of color in it to help keep all the children calm.  They may be overwhelmed by all the colors in our house...especially our red couches.
• They are under very close medical observation while in the baby home and have daily developmental activities.
• It is unlikely that our child will have any personal toys and therefore may not be used to the typical American child's toy chest.
• All their daily routines will be in a group setting with the other children in the home.  They may feel overwhelmed to come to our house where all the attention is just on them.
• They may have dark hair and dark eyes and come from a gypsy background.  Or they could have blonde hair and blue eyes.  This will vary depending on the region.
• Because there are many children in the Baby Home our child will not have a lot of one on one attention given to them and so they may have developmental, social and/or psycho social delays.  But most kids pick things up very quickly when they are in there forever homes.

These are just some of the things that we are learning about our child and we thought you might like to know them as well.  As we learn more we'll be sure to share with you.  Please be praying for our child as this is a traumatic experience in their life.  It has the potential to really scar them.  We ask that you pray for every aspect of their life.  Even thought they are little they have suffered the loss of hearing their biological mother's heartbeat and her voice.  This is the beginning of their trauma and we pray for healing.  We also want to pray for their birthparents.  We do not know the circumstances of their life but we do know that this could not have been an easy thing to do.  

It Takes A Village

When Lenski and I started preparing for the adoption process we sent out a letter to friends and family.  Maybe you received one of these or maybe you read it on this blog.  In the letter we shared the details of how much the adoption would cost and invited people to join us in this.  We talked about how it was very similar to the TV commercials you see asking for your monthly support to help children around the world.  Except this time you would actually be able to meet this child and see how their life would change.

When we wrote this letter we never imagined that our little cousin would embrace this idea so much and become one of our biggest supporters.  Her name is Ally and she is 8 years old.  She lives in Indiana with her family.  We don't get to see her and her family often enough but they have been a huge source of encouragement.  When Ally found out that we were adopting from Russia she decided to decorate a container and label it "Pennies for Primos".  Primo is cousin in Spanish.  So she started her own little fundraiser for us.  According to her mom she is always trying to sell things to make some money to give to us.  She is also driving up with her family to help us out with our garage sale. (June 14-16) She (and her family) have blessed us so much.

You might not think that one little girl could do much but...the day Lenski and I were leaving to go out of town we got a check in the mail from Ally's fundraising.  It was a check for over $45!  She had collected that much change in April alone!  We were stunned to say the least.

We love the saying, "It takes a village".  Well, children are always part of the village.  Maybe we just aren't giving them enough credit.  So here's to you Ally!  Thank you for all that you've done and all that you're still doing to help bring home your new little cousin.  We love you.

Why am I surprised when God shows up?

I've been a Christian long enough to know that God loves to swoop in with crazy plans that always work and make everything just right.  So why is it that I still get surprised by it?  I know it's going to happen but when it does I'm left stunned.  I think I missed a class on this in church or something.

And so the story goes with this adoption process.  I know God has this under control.  I'm even unusually calm about all of it.  I just have a strong peace about it.  And yet...I still get surprised.

As most of you know we recently turned in our formal application to begin the adoption.  With the application we had to turn over $3,900.  We had raised a little over $3,000 by the time the day came to turn it in.  Obviously a little shy of what was needed.  But we weren't worried.  The day came and Lenski left early in the morning to take a trip.  I got up and did my usual thing with quite a bit of extra excitement.    I couldn't wait to turn in the application.  But before I could I had stuff to do.  I gathered up everything I needed for the day and hopped in the car.  My first stop was the bank to deposit the money to cover the check.  Even though we hadn't raised all the money and still don't know how we'll pay for all the fees, I was more than calm...I was ecstatic.  So I was about to pull out of the drive way when the mailbox caught my eye.  I figured I might as well check it since I wouldn't be home until later in the afternoon.  I hopped and walked over to.  When I opened it up I saw a card from a friend of ours.  I thought to myself, "That's such sweet timing to get a card in the mail."  We had received some other cards with such encouraging thoughts that I assumed this would be the same...which it was.  But as I opened the card up to read it a check fell out.  I thought, "Oh, how sweet of them to send a check and on such a perfect day."  I set it aside and read the card first without looking at the check.  What a blessing the card alone was.  We keep them all and read them from time to time.  Then I figured I should look at the check.  As I opened it up I couldn't believe my eyes...it was written out for $1,000 dollars!  I bust out laughing.  Probably not the normal response but I just couldn't help myself.  God decided to swoop in and make everything more than alright.

The great thing about this story is that our friends couldn't have known that their card would arrive when it did.  They couldn't have known that I would check the mail RIGHT BEFORE HEADING TO THE BANK!  It was God...swooping in once again.  And all I could do was laugh...the rest of the day.

To all of you who have given to us whether it's been through encouraging words, donations, change, coffee purchases or more...you are being God's hands and feet not only to us but to a little one that none of us even know yet.  You are already impacting a child's life.  Thank you.  May God bless you richly.

To Buy or To Make - Why Adoption

The stereotype is this - If you can't have a baby yourself then you can always adopt.

Most people see no problem with this statement. The truth is most people don't even think much about a sentiment like that. Isn't that what adoption is for? For families that couldn't make it happen themselves? I know, I know. That's not what people are saying. But if you stop and think about the implications of the above statement...it kinda is.

When Lenski and I started talking about having a family we talked about how many kids we wanted, what we thought they'd look like, made up funny stories about how they'd turn out like Lenski and...that we definitely wanted to adopt. Not a lot of people know this. We weren't trying to keep it a secret or anything. People were just so excited that we were ready to start trying that the focus fell on having biological children. It didn't bother us really because we figured we might as well try the old fashioned way first before we figure out how to afford adoption. Then things went the way the often do.

We did all the usual trying procedures. Did lots of tests and saw lots of doctors. Heck, my dad even offered Lenski a picture book to make sure he knew what he was doing (he was joking). But in the end we were told that it is VERY unlikely that we will ever have biological children. It took us awhile to come back from that. But when we did we felt there was no point in waiting anymore and we might as well get started with the adoption process.

This is the part of the story that many friends and family have gotten wrong. We DIDN'T choose to adopt BECAUSE of infertility. We had already made that choice when we decided to have a family. The only thing that changed was timing. Getting pregnant when neither of you are working is fine. Nobody can tell you you're not allowed to do that. Adopting, however, is very different. And we were told we couldn't get started until one of us had a job. Which meant we would have to wait until Lenski was out of school and found a job. We were crushed. But thankfully, God had other plans and we are ready to start the process.

I share this with you because I'd like to clear up some misconceptions about our journey and our view on adoption. Here are some things you need to know:

1. The money we are spending on adoption would not be better spent on trying to fix our infertility. If it's going to happen it's going to be by God's hand...and that's just the way we like it.
2. Yes, this adoption is very expensive. It's about as expensive as one of your cars, a down payment on your house, college tuition and more. But just as those things have value...so does our future child and there's no amount of money that would be too much to give that child the opportunity to know love and a better life.
3. Adoption is NOT and was NOT our plan B. It was always part of plan A for our family.
4. We believe strongly in orphan care not just adoption. We believe we are commanded to take care of them in scripture.

The author of one of my favorite books, Red Letters, wrote a blog post on scriptures that talk about caring for the orphan. If you'd like to check it out please click here. I would encourage you to do so to understand where we're coming from.

We apologize to anyone who is saddened that we're not trying more for biological children. Please understand that to us children are children, no matter how they come to you. We hope that when we finally bring home our child you will be able to give him or her the same kind of love you would if we had brought them home from the hospital. They will need it just as much and so will we.

If you still have questions or concerns please feel free to contact one of us. We would be happy to sit and chat with you.

Why Russia?

When Lenski and I decided to pursue adoption we originally planned on adopting an infant domestically. We had it all planned out...as people often do...and then we saw God's plan. Here's how it happened:

A moment

Many people we know who have already adopted talked about this moment they had where they "just knew". Whether it was about a specific child, where to adopt from or even the agency, they all described this moment they had where things were very clear and they become certain about something. Lenski and I had not experienced that. We were not concerned about it but rather curious.

The meeting

We had already chosen which agency we wanted to go with so we decided to go to one of their informational meetings. We were so excited that we got there super early and were the first ones. That was great for us because we had the undivided attention of the staff. We told them all about our plans and asked lots of questions. The meeting was actually a two part presentation they told us. The first part was about adopting domestically and the second was about international adoption. Since we were certain about adopting domestically they said that we could just leave during the intermission if we wanted to. Then they gave us the packet of information about domestic adoption. We gladly took it and were ready to dive into it when they hesitantly said, "And here's the international packet. Would you like to just take it to look at?" Not wanting to be rude we took it and sat down. We said, "Sure, it couldn't hurt to look at it." We had no idea what we had just done.

The meeting hadn't started yet and we decided to flip through the international packet since we had already devoured the domestic one. In the folder was information on the three countries they work with; China, Ethiopia and Russia. When we saw the Russia information it was as though pieces of a puzzle began to fall into place. Here's what I mean:

• Lenski got his name because his mother was reading a Russian novel.
• We already have a Russian girl's name picked out.
• Lenski is obsessed with Russian names. (Ask him about Mariska Hargitay)
• That day in class (prior to the meeting) Lenski told his classmates that he thought Russian was the most beautiful language.
• Lenski used to know the Russian national anthem.
• My name is also Russian.
• When we talk about where we'd love to travel Lenski's #1 spot is Russia.

These are just some small pieces. The big ones were happening in our hearts. We both got so excited that we could hardly pay attention to the lady who had begun the presentation on domestic adoption. We kept whispering back and forth and asking each other how we'd feel about going with Russia instead. Lenski looked like a little puppy whose owner had just come home. You know what that looks like right? The puppy gets so excited that they may even pee a little because they're so happy. That was Lenski. I thought he was going to jump up and down and start clapping but thankfully the room full of people seemed to restrain him.

So we decided to stay and listen to the international presentation. We could hardly wait. The intermission took forever and then she started. But she started with China. So we tried to stay calm and composed. Then she went on to Ethiopia and I thought I was going stand up and scream like a dictator for her to tell me about Russia this instant. Thankfully, I didn't.

Finally Russia

When the lady began to talk about Russia we both became relaxed and more excited at the same time. If that's even possible. I was taking notes and couldn't write fast enough. I knew it was all in the packet but I somehow thought that writing it would make it more real or happen faster. Oh the things we think when we're excited. She began to tell us that there are three types of Russian children you could adopt. This was a surprise to us. She said that because of Russia's location some children will look Chinese. Others will look caucasian. As she's saying this she refers to pictures that are on the wall which I had not noticed. They were pictures of children who had already been adopted. The last one she mentioned was Roma which are gypsies. When she pointed us to the picture of a Roma girl my heart stopped...

The Dream

To understand why my heart stopped I have to take you back to Christmas morning. I woke up early in the am on Christmas morning because I had a very powerful dream. I dreamed that I was walking through a place that seemed like a hospital and was holding a child in my arms. I was not in a hospital gown and the child wasn't looking at me. When I looked down at the child she turned to look at me. She was, in fact, not an infant. She was a toddler. She had olive toned skin, dark hair with the bangs cut across her forehead and lots of teeth. I noticed the teeth because she smiled at me.

There's more to the dream but that's for another day. Let's stick with this part for right now.

Back to the meeting

When the lady pointed us to the picture of a Roma Russian girl my heart stopped because it was the girl from my dream. She had olive toned skin, the same big eyes, the same full set of teeth and her hair was also exactly the same. Bangs cut across her forehead. Now remember that this girl has already been adopted but I couldn't help but feel like God was nudging me in this direction. I slapped Lenski and said, "That's the girl from my dream!" Lenski of course replied, "What dream?" even though he had to spend part of Christmas morning consoling me because of the dream. I quickly reminded him and we both just didn't know what to say.

After the meeting

We hopped in our car after the meeting was over and there was only silence. Lenski decided he would try and figure out how to converse about what we just experienced. He wanted to be fair so he asked me what I thought about the domestic presentation. I just looked at him and said, "I have no idea what she even said." The truth was that we both tried to listen but couldn't because our hearts had been turned to Russia and we could think of nothing else. We still wanted to make sure that we weren't just experiencing some weird adoption high so we said we'd give it some time and prayer. What happened was that our excitement for Russia only grew as the days passed. We couldn't stop talking about it. We finally realized...we had our moment. The meeting was it. Everything was clear and we felt certain. We want to adopt from Russia.

Greetings Friends & Family

As some of you may know, for the last two years Lenski has stepped away from doing full-time ministry in order to pursue a Masters degree at Grand Rapids Theological Seminary. It’s been a long hard road and the end is in sight. He will be graduating in May with a Masters degree in Intercultural Ministries. We are very excited about what the future holds and he is already pursuing ministry leads that we hope will begin in May or June.

While this is exciting and no doubt will change our lives, it is not the most anticipated event about to happen to us. We have begun the process to adopt a child from Russia. Yes, Lenski’s name will finally make sense. It is because of this new development that we are writing.

Lenski and I have been dreaming of growing our family for a while now. We always knew that adoption would be part of that and now it seems that the time has come to start. In looking at adoption possibilities we were surprised to see how many options there were. After taking some time to pray about it, we feel very certain that Russia is the route we need to take.

With that goal ahead of us we are faced with numerous fees and expenses that naturally come in the adoption process. While we do have savings that we plan to use, the total cost for this adoption will be around $40,000. I may be good with money but that’s a little beyond my reach and our savings will not cover it. As we have spoken with friends who have adopted and the agency we are going through, both have told us that we should ask friends and family for help. It may seem like an unusual request but it’s no more unusual than the commercials you see on TV asking you to give to orphans in foreign countries. Instead of just helping them while they are somewhere else we are asking for your help to partner with us in changing their life permanently. There are many ways you can help. There is a list on the left side of this page to help you get started. This is a huge undertaking and we need help in so many ways. At the bottom of this post you will find our list of fees that we have and we would love for you to pray over them. If you would consider being part of this life-changing event or have any questions you’d like to ask please contact us via phone or e-mail. We look forward to hearing from you.

Lenski - lenski76@gmail.com / 616-821-2042

Tanya - savedfromwaste@yahoo.com / 616-821-2778

Fees

Due with Formal application - $3,900

30 days after Formal application submission (home study) - $1,685

During home study (pre-adoption education & psychological evaluation) - $230-$2,000

Fingerprinting & USCIS (immigration) - $805

During our dossier preparation (notary / authentication) - $60-$1,200

Upon submission of our dossier - $7,705

Visa's - $1,200-1,500

During our first trip to Russia (we have to take 2-3) - $1,500

Once we've accepted a referral (the referral of a particular child in the orphanage) - $15,570

During our second trip to Russia - $2,050 - $3,910

Travel expenses - unknown at this time but could be around $5,000 and up